Saturday, February 17, 2007
Realisation: The 5C’s of a Spiritual MarriageThe way I look at it, a happy spiritual marriage should have these 5 C’s -
1. Commitment : This is obvious. If each can't totally commit to the other, there's no need to talk about marriage in the first place. Why commit half-heartedly for life? Why live half a lie, while seeking the truth on the spiritual path?
2. Compassion : At times, different opinions and views might arise. Mutual compassion is needed to ensure conflicts or grudges are resolved with understanding. Both need to see that to be resentful is to hurt each other. When we are unkind, we lose our spirituality in the moment.
3. Cultivation : Right spiritual cultivation results in wisdom, with which one will do less wrong, while becoming more virtuous to each other and for the world at large. Commitment above is not just to each other, but to a common spiritual goal too. Without the latter, the marriage is a mundane union, not a spiritual one. The Bodhisattva (Buddha-to-be) before his enlightenment is said to have cultivated together with Yasodhara for 500 lives as husband and wife.
4. Communication : A relationship without sufficient communication is not a working relationship because the true essence of what makes a healthy living spiritual relationship live is the continual exchange of kind and wise thoughts (not bodily fluids!), which better each other. Learning and sharing the Dharma together makes any relationship spiritual, whether it is also carnal or not.
5. Choice : Commitment, as mentioned above, should not be mistaken as attachment to each other. In other words, there is always freedom of choice for each party. Freedom in the sense that though the couple might be largely agreeable on many issues, they are still free to see certain issues from their individual perspectives. If both parties are exactly alike, they might as well have married themselves or stayed single! Ultimately, choice here also refers to the generosity of being able to gladly let the other party go should one choose to renounce the relationship for a spiritual or even mundane cause. –Zlyrica + Shen Shi'an (from
moonpointer. com
For you <3 11:06 PM